Reg Writes
12. Snow Business (Part 2)
I’m pawfectly delighted as I’ve just cast Cat Damon and Brad Kitt-y in my film. Now where was I? Ah yes, locked out, owner away, snow on the ground, an icy pond next to me. Sniff, sniff, sniff. The air was crisp and cold but there was no mistaking the whiff I sniffed. DOG! Yikes! And a BIG and nasty one, too.
Mad Max the pit bull from number 189 was growling and drooling like a mad thing. He licked his lips and I knew what he was thinking about – a nice cat sandwich only with no bread and me as the filling. I had to react and fast.
As he leapt for me, I dived low and to the side. One of his sharp claws just grazed my ear but none of the others caught me as he charged headlong onto the icy pond. I watched the Winter Olympics on telly sitting on Clive’s lap and let me tell you, Max isn’t going to win a gold, silver or bronze medal for figure skating. He spun round and round, howling and yelping before he cannonballed into the rockery behind the pond. THUD. I ran!
Don’t look back. That’s what they teach you at cat school where I got purrrrr-fect grades. I scampered away as fast as I could, leapt the fence and was back in my own garden. As I sprinted up the driveway and turned the corner, something hard, cold and heavy hit me straight in the whiskers. BANG! I was dazed but the thing I hit, a milk bottle came off worse. It toppled down the step and smashed.
So, whilst Max the dog yelped and woofed (don’t worry, he was fine, just hurt pride) Reg the tabby (that’s me!) turned out to be the cat who got the cream or near enough, as the milk was full fat. There was just time to drink my fill before Clive returned and when he’d realised I’d been out, I even got extra treats including bits of turkey and a nice warm fire in the living room. Ahhh, a nice happy ending
Purrs and hugs
Reg
Q: What is a cat's way of keeping law & order?
A: Claw Enforcement!